November is among my favorite and least favorite times of year. The Thanksgiving holiday is a tragic rewriting of history that whitewashes genocide and the forced relocation of Indigenous Americans. The United States of America, the country where I was born and raised, is colonial, and colonialism is, by definition, never mutually beneficial–it is never equal or equitable, despite this country’s long standing rhetoric of equality.
In addition, my grandmother, with whom I was always close, died on November 30, 2017, and this year I’m feeling her loss more than I expected. Six years is not a major milestone, and because I feel her with me all the time, I don’t miss her like I once did, but remembering her death is painful.
Nonetheless, I have so much to celebrate and be grateful for, and I know my grandmother is celebrating with me. She detested it when people said they were “blessed,” but I really do feel blessed, with or without her approval. I have worked hard to come as far as I have as a writer, performer, tutor, friend, and family member, and yet, saying that I’m blessed feels appropriate. (You can read more about my extraordinary relationship with my grandmother in this essay.)
Here are some reasons I am celebrating, even with all the horrors in the world:
I’m enjoying fall weather. I realize that I’ve tended to think summer is my favorite season because of my birthday and being off of school when I was younger, but now especially I realize how much I enjoy fall, even the dark, gloomy nights with daylight savings. I struggle with seasonal depression in the fall and winter, but maybe it’s the combination of childhood trauma and climate change that made me realize I don’t like summer as much as I thought I did. I’m actually enjoying the rainy and leaf-drenched streets in Chicago this time around
I’m enjoying more community. I’m getting more involved in open mics and book clubs, especially through Chicago’s Three Avenues Bookshop, and putting myself out there more socially. I admit, I’ve put myself out there often online, especially being published online over sixty times (separately from blogs), but I’ve struggled with, say, going to public events. I also deleted some distracting phone apps, so I’m grateful to have more opportunities to get out and spread good news in my life.
I’m enjoying reading a ton–to date I have finished 55 books this year, far more than in any other year. As a slow reader who struggles with concentration because of ADHD, completing this many books feels like a big deal. Next month, I will provide my annual post on books that I read this year that impacted me the most–expect a wide variety!
I’m performing more storytelling gigs, including my first with Tellin’ Tales Theatre and OUTspoken in Chicago. Getting involved with Tellin’ Tales, an organization that seeks to bridge the worlds of disabled and able-bodied people, has been a fantastic experience, especially as part of their Young Adult Writers workshop. My revised story on being a “Recovering Music Snob” has been a joy to perform at different libraries, as was performing this story about dating, recovery, and pop culture as part of OUTspoken at Sidetrack, a gay bar in Boystown in Chicago, for Pride Month in June. With the latter, I remember plenty of laughter and tears from the audience. I felt especially honored to have been invited to perform there.
I am swimming in at least seven potential writing projects. I’d be interested to hear which one(s) you would be most interested in reading:
A book on ‘90s country
An article on essential books on soul music
An essay on contemporary writings on freedom and music
A book on author James Baldwin’s writing about music (expanded from my journal article)
A personal essay on jazz singer Ella Fitzgerald’s music
An article on essential music books of the 21st century
A book of new and revised personal essays on music and autism
My work life is going great. I’m still working multiple part-time jobs as a writing tutor at different colleges in Chicago, but especially with more opportunities for embedded tutoring–basically being a teaching assistant–in multiple classes at one school, as well as private tutoring, I have so much joy in my work, and I don’t think it’s arrogant to say that I’m really good at what I do. I also recently had an interview for a full-time position. More will be revealed.
I am once again chairing the Illinois Woman’s Press Association’s High School Communications Contest for 2024, and I placed quite well in the Professional Contest this year, missing the Silver Feather award for most points across categories by one point–I’ll take it! I am excited to submit in at least ten categories for the 2024 Professional Contest. We’ll see how it goes! I always appreciate reading the judges’ feedback regardless of awards.
My relationships with family members are doing better than ever, especially with some contentious ones that have resulted in past pain. I chalk it up to a lot of work in recovery for different things, which is also going better than it ever has.
I survived a serious fall and subsequent surgery to repair my broken wrist. I am grateful to be alive and thriving.
And at least but not least, I am overjoyed by multiple publications in the past year, especially with PopMatters, the international web magazine at which I am a staff writer. Writing about Tracy Chapman, a book on John Prine, books blending music and personal narrative, and country songs about death has been both fun and serious work, just the way I like research.
Happy holidays to all, regardless of what you celebrate!